Wednesday, January 16, 2013

DIVORCE101

Well, there are a few things I learned this past year, mostly during the latter half of the year anyway. One of the most important things I learned is that attorneys are freaking expensive. They charge you for every single little thing they do, they're so ridiculously expensive I'm surprised they don't charge you for the air you breathe in their office. I also learned that generally lawyers want to do whatever is best a.k..a. makes them most money for them, but I guess that's just par for the course.

One of the things I learned, which I must say has me totally baffled is how some friends have acted throughout the whole thing. More specifically, how some people who I thought were close friends, have acted when confronted with the news that my marriage was on the mend. I get that when people get involved emotionally is not as easy to remain objective, or even to separate oneself from something that does not affect that person directly. What I don't get is how some people can consider themselves good friends when they clearly do not want the best for their friends. Actually, what I don't get is how some people can be so presumptuous as to feel they have a right to tell you what to do and not to do, as if they're in charge of your life, then get upset if you don't follow their orders advice. Is it me or is this just childish and not very friendly?

I also learned a couple of things about myself. I'm quite impulsive at times (who am I kidding, I'm way impulsive and I've known it for a while now...), I can be very stubborn on things that matter to me (ok, I knew that too), I usually think I'm right (who doesn't anyway..), and I'm willing to fight to the end if I think it's a worthy cause (oh yeah, been there done that too). Ok, so 
maybe I haven't learned much new about myself except maybe that impulsivity can be expensive (i.e. attorneys), and that communication is vital to any relationship.

Last but not least, I learned who my real friends are, and sad to say they are very few and far in between. I guess what they say about blood being thicker than water is true. Well, kids, that's all I have for today. Stay tuned for the next life lesson: What I learned from my dogs....

I can't believe I have to do this for a meal...

9 comments:

  1. It's never easy finding out your friends true colors. Even if they don't always agree with you, they should still support you and be there for you.

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  2. Maybe you should go to law school. :)

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  3. I can't give you advice--just a shoulder to cry on...

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  4. Sounds like the counseling is a bust. Sometimes it's hard to tell real friends from acquaintances.

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  5. I've been where you are and all I can do is offer support. And lawyers look out for themselves first, I'm convinced. Hang in there!

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  6. I've lost a few friends this way but I guess it's better to know their true colors than continue to live a lie. It's easy to find friends you can crack a few jokes with, but the ones who truly support your decisions and want what's best for you are few and far between.

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  7. Opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one.
    I don't know that I agree with blood being thicker than water, but maybe that is from my own experience. A true friend is rare.

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  8. My wife and I have been married almost 39 years and during our marriage, we've had several couples who divorced. Often when this happened, other friends of the couple chose sides.
    And a few times, the divorcing couples wanted us to choose sides. We never did. We loved them both or we wouldn't have friended them in the first place.
    We've never lost a friend to divorce, but some of our friends lost us because we wouldn't choose.
    The best of luck to you.
    Rick ~ Your latest follower.

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  9. I think they teach CYA in law school and in dental school. You pretty much have to know the law yourself so you don't get gouged or screwed.
    Friends come into your life for a reason and leave when they are no longer needed or to make room for better friends. It does hurt when people do not have your best interest in mind.
    I wish you the best and thank you for stopping by and commenting.

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